Max is proper busy and can’t get to the phone right now. Leave a message, awite?
From Jackie Reaper
From Emma
From Henri
From Ian Evans
Transcripts
1.
Jackie Reaper
All right, Max, it’s Jackie. I just ‘ad a request to go and anoint a new fast food place at the Deva Stadium.
I don’t anoint things, Max, I’m not der Pope!
What’s dis anyway? Charcoal chicken an’ chips covered in cheese, German beer, lolly ice for dessert, ten quid.
Keeping yer prices down? That’s decent that, lad. Just let me know if this is another prank, will yer?
[slight pause]
God, I’m dead hungry now.
2.
Emma Weaver
Babes, I’ve had an idea for me next book. You’re in bed but I just have to get it out.
Fantasy world, dragons, dragonriders, sexy mermaids, and there’s a princess, Princess Iceland, and she has to get married.
But she dun’t wanna so she tells her suitors, of which there are many coz she’s a smokeshow, they have to do deadly quests.
So there’s a contest and the winner gets to marry her but the losers get killed.
It’s called Marry Me or Die.
Oh and book one’s aboot the only hero who survives the first challenge. He’s called Max Quest.
What do ya think?
3.
Henri Lyons
Max, I have ‘ad some thoughts about the stag party.
Wine tasting in Antwerp with the cast of ‘Amilton.
Zorbing in Weston-super-Mare with two of Depeche Mode.
Geocaching on the Yorkshire Moors with some men called David Mitchell.
Choose one. Goodbye.
4.
Ian Evans
Ian Evans here. Just got off the phone with a gentleman who wants my help making what he calls a ‘topiary Ian Evans.’
I asked him what that meant and he said think of a hedge shaped like you. I said do you mean full body or just a head like on Easter Island?
He said that was a good question and he’d have to ask Max.
I don’t know another Max who would want to turn me into topiary, so I’d like to know what this is all about, please. I’ll be home all day.
Thanks for your support!